I was abused as a child by another child. It was at school, i cannot remember how old I was, maybe around 8. When we sat on the carpet to listen to the teacher he would sit behind me and reach round so his hand was in my knickers. He would then play with me. He had an older brother and I remember standing outside my house and he asked me if I enjoyed it. No idea what I said. I work in a school now and I cannot understand how he could get so close without the teachers noticing or saying anything. from Anonymous
“I’m so sorry to hear that happened to young you. I bet you are protective of the students where you work now, and are watchful in a way that someone (who knows why) wasn’t for you when you needed an adult to help. Again, so sorry, and wishing you all the strength and support." - Meredith
“Unfortunately, as I’m sure you know from being in education, (as have I) children who are abusive are usually playing out what they experience at home. My heart hurts for everyone involved here. As to why a teacher never stopped it, I can’t tell you why, but I will say that a classroom is sometimes a hectic place and I wish that teacher had been able/willing to pay more attention to what you were experiencing. I’m so very sorry this happened to you. It is not ok." - Alex
“I grew up in a small, rural town, the type of place where people didn’t have to lock their doors. When I was in sixth grade, a boy pinched my breasts and nipples repeatedly while my class was playing kickball. I was standing seven feet away from a teacher, but he was pitching the ball and not paying attention. I should have screamed, but I was too shocked to believe it was happening. But there was also that weird social contract/code of silence between kids that you don’t tattle or get others in trouble. It was humiliating that he was doing this to me in front of a teacher and the whole class. I felt dirty. It was hard to be nice to this kid afterward because I didn’t want him to think I liked it, was okay with it, or I wanted him to do it again. He never tried it, but one other kid, who saw what happened, did. Fortunately, I was able to slap him away. Later on, I would be the class “scapegoat” and ostracized and taunted. My class only had 20 students in my entire grade, so it’s not like the teachers couldn’t tell, but none of them did anything. One of them tried to tell me I was different in a good way, and that would make me a better adult, but she did nothing otherwise to make my situation better. This was 30 years ago, and I still can’t forgive or forget.
Basically, I learned that adults will let you down.
It’s amazing that even in this day and age of mandated reporting, where second-graders get suspended for writing stories that mention laser guns or whatever that there’s still this stupefying belief among adults and teachers that “this stuff doesn’t happen here.” Not knowing where you grew up, I wonder if this was the case. It’s amazing how teachers simply don’t want to get involved because they’d have to fill out paperwork, or call a parent conference, or expend effort beyond their school day that they’re underpaid for. It may be simply that your teacher was preoccupied with something else in their personal life, or simply a bad, oblivious teacher. I’m sorry this happened to your child-self. Thank you for being one of the great, attentive teachers who will be vigilant about similar abuse." - Melanie
“I am so sorry this happened to you. I’m sorry it wasn’t addressed in the classroom, and I’m hoping the teacher did not simply disregard the behavior. I am sorry the brother did nothing to protect you either. I personally really connect with your story, as I experienced something similar at a friend’s when I would regularly sleep over. I wish I could take away what happened to you. It was not your fault." - Nikki